Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Truth, Reality, Revelation

I am a writer. Whether I choose to write or not doesn't matter. Refusing to write doesn't make me less of a writer. It just makes me a writer who's given up.

You'll recall I stopped stressing out about my writing and allowed myself to take a break back on 11/7/07. Since then, there have been subtle reminders for me of what I love and the burning desire I have within me to tell stories. I'm at a point now where the people around me no longer doubt that I will be published one day. For them, it's just a matter of me sticking with it and eventually my time will come.

Today I'm humbled by the faith others have in me, the talent I do have and the journey I began so many years ago. Today I recognize I can't give up the fight (not that I really planned to give up entirely). I have to be strong. I have to give myself the chance to take mental vacations while I chase those dreams.

Today I also demand that I acknowledge the negative feelings I've had, but then I MUST leave them behind. The bottom line is I want to be published. I want my name on books and I want those book flying off the shelves. These things will NOT happen if I don't get over myself and get back to work. I owe it to my characters. I owe it to my readers. I even owe it to the people who have supported my from the beginning in this endeavor. But most importantly, I owe it to myself.

Giving up in any form is not an option. Difficulty isn't an excuse. I am a writer. Whether I choose to write or not doesn't matter. If I want to be a successful writer, I have to put the pen back on the paper, put the words back in order. I must persevere.

10 comments:

Crystal said...

You go girl!! Just have FUN with it, when it becomes work that's when people get discouraged. I have faith in you and so do your characters and friends!! Chin up girl and get to writing! Major adventures just waiting for you to tell!!

Lexi said...

Thanks, Crystal! I think I might have a grasp on some magical nuggets! Great ideas are flowing...

Michelle said...

You say, 'refusing to write ... makes me a writer who's given up.'I'm not sure I agree with that. There are times when writers have to relax. Live. Think. Enjoy, revel, read, goof. Not write, so then they can write again with a heightened awareness of the process and the pleasure of writing. This might just have been one of those times for you.

Whatever the case, you'll definitely be published. I have no doubt about that.

monika_schulze said...

We only have faith in you because it's warranted and you deserve it. (Is that the same thing?) Is there any doubt you will be published when the market is right? No!

Lexi said...

Ah, Michelle, I see what you're saying. I wasn't clear. In my head and possibly my heart I had thought about quitting the pursuit to publication. As to the rest of your comments, you're right. I've been playing for 2 weeks now and I'm slowly getting re-inspired.

And to the vote of confidence? Thanks!

Lexi said...

Thanks to you too, Monika!

And thanks to you all for giving my fragile writer ego the boost it needs to get back into the fray. I promise not to complain...much...for a few more months.

Bonnie Ferguson said...

You will persevere! :)

Lexi said...

Thanks, Bonnie! I've some stubborn Scottish blood in me so I guess you're right!

Heather said...

Lexi - I completely understand your feelings. They're valid and normal and I think all of us aspiring writers have them. Hopefully it will get easier for us to persevere once we do have our name on that book cover. Sometimes it's so nebulous right now. I get that and I feel it too. You're not alone, my friend.

Lexi said...

Thanks, Heather! It helps to know that and remember it. (Or be reminded.)